Unlike in face-to-face conversations, messaging tends to be perceived with an additional level of hostility (perhaps due to the lack of facial expression and body language).

Thus it's best for us to take some offset. For the sender, be extra polite beyond how you normally would. For the reader, take it down some notches on what you interpret how aggressive a message is. Assume positive intent by default.

(The same bias applies to other written forms of communication as well. GitHub PR’s reviews for example. For emails, people tend to be excessively polite already.)